That damn green grass

When I was a working mom I worked long hours and rarely got to spend time with my kids during the week. I longed for the day I would get to parent full time. Most days I spent at least 10 hours a day at work because billable hours are no joke. It’s a terrible system and I hate the evil person who created it. For every 7 hours I billed, I would have had to work at least 8½-9 hours. Many times however, I would end up working 12 hours or more and get home when my babies were so far gone that my kisses didn’t even register.

At a certain point I became fed up with my part-time parenting so I decided to quit my job and join my husband overseas. I wanted to mother my children all the time, and my children needed me (in my mind at least). Now they never miss my kisses because I’m with them practically 24 hours a day. Awesome right? Well yes, unless it’s one of those days where my husband is traveling, my daughter has homework I don’t understand, both of my boys are extra cranky and destructive, and I barely have time to think, let alone take a much needed shower.

I had such a day last week, while my husband was away on a three day road trip. It had been a harrowing three days to say the least. I was exhausted and longed for the days where I could escape to office life and the land of adult conversation. It started like this.

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Then soon progressed to this.

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It was as if all hell had broken loose. My three year old was crying for everything and nothing. My 15 month old was throwing legos, books, and tissue all over the living room, while laughing, then crying, then laughing again. No one wanted to take a bath so I ran after them, switching between threats and bribes to make it happen. My 7 year old watched in amusement as I failed miserably that night. I eventually said F it and just gave in to the crazy. They finally wore themselves out, and with two out of three down, I was able to put things in perspective. It was 11pm and I was enjoying a glass of wine with a 1 year old who refused to go to sleep. Not the most exciting Saturday night I’ve had, but a few years ago I would have been at the office toiling away while longing for what I have now.

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So be careful what you wish for, but appreciate it when it comes. That’s how I keep my sanity.

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